Jealousy due to arrival of new baby

A new baby. A new beginning. Not only for you but also for your first child. Your child is used to getting all the attention from mom and dad. And of course that changes when a new baby arrives. How to best deal with that, I'm going to help you with.

How do I tell my child?

If you're expecting your second child, it's best to break the news to your first child as soon as possible. That way he or she has more time to get used to the idea that he or she is going to have a sibling. If you have a toddler, it is better to wait until it is visible that you are pregnant. Otherwise, your toddler won't understand that something is going on because he won't see any change. When you tell, be as honest and clear as possible. Just as parents sense that children have something to hide, children feel the same way about their parents. No one knows your child better than you. Therefore, we cannot tell you exactly how to bring it up, because every child reacts differently. However, we can give you some tips. 

Explaining change

Obviously, many things are going to change. Including a baby's room. When you go to buy things for the baby's room, it is good to involve your child. This way your child will already feel attracted to the new baby. Make sure your child learns to share. Because from the moment the baby arrives there would be jealousy anyway. If you teach him or her to share in time, they can handle it better and will be better at learning to let go. Talk to your child a lot. Try to explain as much as possible that when the new baby arrives, not much will change. Especially the love for your child. 

How to recognize jealousy:

• When he is sweet to the baby but angry and aggressive toward you or your partner.
• He withdraws.
• Your child may start behaving more childishly.
• He may have tantrums more quickly.
• Your child asks when the baby will leave again.

Tips for jealousy:

• Try to let your child become more independent, so he or she also learns to play alone.
• Give your child space to get angry or sad sometimes. 
• Give your child some extra attention when the baby is sleeping, for example. That way, he or she will be a lot less jealous when they see you with the new baby. 
• Involve your child in taking care of the baby. For example, when you go to wash the baby, let him or her help. That way there will also be a kind of sense of responsibility toward the sibling.
• Let your child know that you love him as much as you love his younger sibling. 
• Show understanding for the jealousy and talk about it. 
• Divide your attention well.

Jealousy is very normal

Despite the fact that a jealous toddler can get your blood under your nails, you must realize that this is normal behavior. Toddlers are not yet verbally strong enough to express their emotions.